Sunday, May 29, 2011
"There is a kind of happiness and wonder that makes you serious. It is too good to waste on jokes." ~C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle.
This has been a day of strange joys.
The thudding roar of intense rain, the flash and crack of yet another storm sweeping over the earth, overwhelming me with a strange combination of innocent wonder and chilling fear...
...driving through the deluge, surrounded by a waterfall of raindrops...lost in a whirlwind.
The sweetest surprise of being chosen among a crowd as one of six bloggers who won a beautiful giveaway hosted by the sweet and beautiful Anna Grace at Roman Holiday...
...such honor and joy that caused me to cast my twenty years of maturity to the side for just a moment and let out a squeal of unbridled excitement.
The unexpected blessing found in a sweet word of love from a friend close to my heart but far from my presence...
...realizing that someone is thinking of me and praying for me, even from so far away, is such a tender and comforting joy.
But then, even in all these earthly delights that have seemed to be the greatest of treasures...there was one moment of my day that far surpasses any other happiness that I have yet experienced.
I spent my morning, hands raised and eyes closed, simply lost in the glory and majesty of the King of the Universe...heard His voice whispering in my ear, and felt His tender love encompassing my heart.
There is no place on earth I would rather be than in His presence...no feeling more comforting and sublime than the one found when the realization of what my Lord out of His intense love for me.
He is my treasure...
...and my utmost delight.
"God can't give us peace and happiness apart from Himself because there is no such thing." ~C.S. Lewis
Thursday, May 26, 2011
"I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious." ~Albert Einstein
(This post is in celebration of the blog party hosted by Jocee @ Cupcake Dictionary as she celebrates her 100th follower. Congratulations, beautiful girl!)
I have made no secret my love of the spring and summer months....
...never have I striven to hide my dreams of wandering Paris streets, umbrella in hand...a secret stash of dollars in my pocket...
...whispered desires of café au lait and leather-bound books in open-air pâtisseries.
Summer is my time of waffle cones heaped with strawberry ice cream...beach-side dreams of Hugh Grant and Johnny Depp sightings...mani-pedis and Imogene Heap albums, sprawled under a tree with my bare toes tingling in the grass.
I adore the feel of the sun running its reviving fingers down my neck as I scrawl LOVE in the sand, watching the waves take my footprints and words back into its salty depths...
I long for wide open grassy fields, lost in my own tiny patch of blue sky...
...wishing for a moment to be wandering among the English hills in the mentality of Lizzie Bennet or Marianne Dashwood, a flower-decked straw hat captured between my fingers, lost in the thought of some romantic sonnet composed for my ears alone.
My summers are yellow and plum...Dr. Pepper and peaches so juicy that their joy trickles out the corners of my mouth and down my chin and neck...mornings of watermelon and nights of sapphire...pool blues and maple-leaf greens.
Wax your surfboard and throw open the curtains.
Grab a sugar-frosted cupcake and a book -- from novella to dictionary -- and float out to sea in a small, wooden boat.
Leap into sparkling puddles and dance barefoot in the lawn with daisies in your hair.
...never waste a moment.
...never waste a summer.
"Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes / How do you measure, measure a year? / In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights In cups of coffee / In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife...how do you measure a year in the life?" ~Seasons of Love, RENT
When you look at those numbers, three simple digits, so very small and almost insignificant.
But when you look a little deeper, you start to see all the things that are captured in those simple little marks on the page...in the space of a year.
Whispers of joys -- shared moments between friends, celebrations and monumental occurrences, some of which happen only once in a lifetime.
The splashing of tears...unspoken sorrows that are often only implied and never spoken outright. Tear-stained pillow cases and watered-out ink scribblings upon innocent pages.
Yes, a lot can happen in a year.
And to be honest, I never thought I would get this far.
I'd blogged before the beginning of DramaticElegance, and honestly, it had never really gone anywhere. My thoughts alway seemed to hit some kind of block, or I simply found myself wandering away and losing interest.
Perhaps it was because I felt stiffled. I felt like I couldn't simply speak out and share the depths of my heart with the world. Perhaps I felt as though I would be judged...that nothing I had to say was worth anyone's time or attention.
But then I decided to try again...just once more.
The name came from my best friend's clever and creative mind. I asked her for a word or two that best described me....it look her no more than two seconds to say "dramatic and elegant." The name was created in an instant.
And so, a year ago today -- May 26th, 2010, I began.
And I have never once looked back.
58 followers. 98 posts. 365 days.
To each and every one of my followers and readers: I thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to read my heartfelt scribblings and to impart so much wisdom and love to me.
To Jocee at Cupcake Dictionary, thank you so much for the new layout, design, and for all your delightful input into my blog and into my life. Thank you also for the one-year celebratory button that you made especially for me.
And to the King of the world, my Lion and my Lord, my Savior and Salvation...I give You all the highest praise, honor, and glory. You are the One for whom I write, and the One to whom all the credit is due.
...so now, I ask you, my readers...what can I do to be better? Why do you read what I write, and how can I improve?
The second year has begun.
I will go further up....I will go further in...
...and I will strive for His glory.
" ~Sidewalk Prophets, You Can Have Me
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
"In dreams, we enter a world that's entirely our own." ~Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
I love these rain-glistening nights.
These nights that I spend leaning against the windowpane, gazing out at the raindrops running down the glass, glinting like diamonds in the streetlights.
It's nights like these that allow me to dream...
...to dream of tumbling down the rabbit hole after Alice and her White Rabbit...to find a place where up is down and tea is the balm to any complicated mind.
I wish to dream of carousels, rising and falling atop a painted horse...secret kisses on the boardwalk, his lips alive with hints of sea-salted air.
My mind is alive, eager to find the place whispered to be located just past the second star to the right...
...to find the land where my King is a Lion and centaurs leap through the trees.
The wind carries me over the sea...to sip my tea and pour through the pages of a leather-bound novel, tucked away at a tiny cafe table in the shadow of the Eiffel Tower.
These are my dreams.
These are my wishes.
They are not possible in my waking moments...
...not yet, anyway.
So now, I will sit and gaze out the window at the sparkling raindrops...
...and I will simply dream.
"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream." ~C.S. Lewis
"And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God." ~1 Corinthians 6:11
There are so many things I love about summertime.e
The warm weather and gentle breezes, the trips to the beach and vacations with family.
But there is one thing I love more than anything else -- summer storms.
Last night, we received one such heavenly explosion.
Thunder crashing loud enough to rattle the window panes...winds so fierce that trees were bowed...pebble-like hail snapping like popcorn on the pavement...
...and the rain. Oh, the splashing torrents of water pouring down from thick, black stormhead clouds.
As I stood at the slightly-opened door, gazing out at the terrifying beauty on display, the rain began to splash up from the stoop and began to soak my feet and legs.
Only a few moments spent outside to close my car's windows was more than enough to soak me through and cause streams of clear rainwater to flow down my face and neck, pooling into droplets on my eyelashes.
I was completely drenched.
And it was in that moment that the reality of God rang so clear in my heart and soul...almost the point of causing me to shout aloud with clarity.
I want to be overflowing with God.
I want to drown in His majesty.
I want to be swimming in the River of His love, covered from head to toe in the peace that passes all understanding.
I want to leap into the puddles of His joy and salvation.
I want to be so close to Him that droplets of His power soak me through, and act as evidence to the entire world that I am serving at the foot of the Cross.
I want to be drenched again.
Then I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your filthiness... Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh." ~Ezekiel 36:25-26
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
"Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me / Fighting to make the mirror happy / Trying to find whatever is missing / Won't You help me back to glory..." Beautiful, Bethany Dillon
I hate the mirror.
I know I shouldn't.
I know that I'm supposed to look in that reflective piece of glass and "love the skin I'm in," or whatever tired cliche is in fashion at the current moment.
But I don't.
I feel unpretty.
I look in the mirror and I see a sea of imperfections...so many things that might not even be visible to others...
...things that make me cringe and ache for a rock to shatter the mirror into a million razored shards, despite the stigma of bad luck..
...because even bad luck would be better than counting my flaws one by one until I run out of fingers and toes upon which to keep a tally.
I look at my female friends, the beautiful people with whom I surround myself, and I ache to share their looks...
I want to banish my curves to the back of the closet, and to fit in their size 2 jeans...to toss a head of smooth, silky hair...to slip my feet into normal sized shoes instead of those of my ten year old sister-in-law...to reach the top shelf at the bookstore instead of having to ask a taller clerk to assist me.
I just want to be beautiful. Just for a minute.
It's a struggle. It's a painful ache that throbs at the core of my soul.
But then, Truth begins to push its way past the boulders of my own self-shame.
...I know He sees my flaws. Those things I hate about myself, the things I would call "ugly."
He calls me by name.
He is the lifter of my head, drawing my eyes from my own reflection to His glory.
He is beautiful. And I am His daughter, His chosen one.
Made in His image. Lost in His wonder.
Time and again,
He makes me beautiful.
"You make me beautiful / You make me stand in awe / You step inside my heart, and I am amazed / I love to hear You say / Who I am is quite enough / You make me worthy of love / and beautiful." ~Beautiful, Bethany Dillon
Monday, May 23, 2011
Cupcake Dictionary) gave a great deal of her time and energy to making my little blog look truly beautiful.
And so, to her, I raise a cup of coffee. Brava, sweetheart!
But as I sat at my computer, observing the new layout and design of this little corner of the internet that I call home...I was truly struck by something.
The blog finally looks like me.
Before, my blog's design was pretty with hints of my desired drama and elegance...but it lacked any sense of personality or transparency. It was vague and airy with very little of my fingerprint to be seen.
But now...it's truly paints a portrait of who I am.
My heart is made of red velvet curtains and sheet music, with a hint of rose petals for good measure....beating to the rhythm of Parisian streets and carriages passing atop cobblestone-paved avenues.
My blood runs red with passion and delight...composed with hints of freshly brewed coffee, melted chocolate, and the ink from a thousand pens.
My eyes glitter with stars and imagination...my nose is flooded with the aroma of country breezes and white jasmine.
My lips are laden with poetry and prose, glory and honor to the King of the universe.
My Hogwarts letter has been lost in the mail, and the plaintive cry of the wolf makes my breath rise and my skin shiver.
I am the love child of music and candlelight.
I am the daughter of Aslan, and my song is love.
I am a princes of the Kingdom of Heaven.
I am a thundering whisper. I am a roaring lamb.
I am no one else...
Friday, May 20, 2011
"Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast." ~Lewis Carroll
(This post was inspired by a post done by the beautiful Jocee at her blog Cupcake Dictionary)
This world is strange to me.
There are times that I walk down the street, and I think, "do I belong here? Is this where I truly fit?"
Because, if i am truly honest...I don't feel normal here.
...but then again, would I want to?
This world has shut out the impossible.
Reality has become defined by the senses, truth by the individual and not by the fact.
I'm a dreamer. Perhaps a bit too much.
But I don't belong here.
Because I believe in the impossible.
I believe in Truth. I believe in Light. I believe in Him.
Six impossible things, you say? Well, here you are.
1. I believe that I am loved, regardless of my broken past.
2. I believe that the King of the universe traded in His crown of gold for a thousand thorns -- for me.
3. I believe He's coming back to take me to His kingdom to reign with Him forever.
4. I believe that, through His blood, my shame is gone...my life is claimed...and my past and future is forgiven.
5. I believe that Death has been overthrown and Hell has been defeated.
6. I believe in Jesus Christ.
Impossible? Most definitely.
But with my God, all things are possible.
And I was right...I don't belong in this world.
... because I was made for another place.
"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." ~C.S. Lewis